I often think about how what we say we want vs what we really want often differs so much. It is an interesting blindspot.
“Nothing in Biology Makes Sense Except in the Light of Evolution”
This phrase is something I’ve learned to trust as a guiding principle to explain many things I find puzzling. It seems our brains do not work logically; they take honed shortcuts to make sure that we survive. The valleys of efficiency that we regressed into seem to have not prioritized seeing ourselves correctly.
I was thinking recently that it is probably the case that because we are sexually dimorphic, there are advantages to the sexes not seeing each other clearly either. I think for every ounce that men get physically stronger than women, men probably also develop feelings—or blindspots!—for women that make them not want to simply crush women.
To this day the sexes do not see each other clearly. Many people complain openly about it. But I think gratitude is the appropriate response. Things happened this way for a reason. On that note, gratitude should also be the appropriate response to us not seeing ourselves clearly either. Hidden wisdom is lurking there.