Someone asked me this question. A few things come to mind.
1. You can be absolutely perfect and do everything exactly right and still fail—in a relationship for example. Because other people are a wildcard. Don’t take it personally.
2. People make decisions first and then rationalize them after the fact. Don’t ask people to explain their decisions cause you’ll just get garbage that they think is true cause it sounds right. It’s nonsense. Everything is rationalizations after the fact. Don’t waste time on others’ rationalizations; All red herrings.
3. People are not inherently good. Most of them inherently want to think they’re good, but this is not the same thing as being good. “Good” people can be downright evil. Sometimes the worst.
4. You are the best version of yourself, given your circumstances. If you could have done better, you would have. And that’s great. If you want to be a different best version of yourself then don’t don’t worry about changing yourself—change your circumstances.